Confidence Isn’t About Being Great

Many people believe that confidence comes from natural talent or immediate success. The truth? Confidence is built by embracing the learning process—even when it feels uncomfortable. You don’t gain confidence by being amazing at something from day one. You gain confidence by putting in the work, making mistakes, and showing up consistently.

Think about any expert in their field. You see their polished work, but you don’t witness the hours of practice, the failures, and the moments of self-doubt they pushed through. Confidence isn’t a feeling you wait for—it’s a muscle you build.

The Power of Repetition and the Sunk Cost Effect

Every time you practice a skill, you’re reinforcing your belief in yourself. There’s a psychological phenomenon called the sunk cost effect—the idea that the more time and energy you invest in something, the more you believe in its value. This is why persistence is key. Every effort you put in compounds over time, making you feel deserving of the success you’re working toward.

From Beginner to Expert: My Personal Journey

I remember when I first started my business coaching journey. I took on free clients, hosted workshops, and spent years refining my skills. Today, my 90-minute business activation sessions are valued at $1,000, and I confidently charge that price because I know the value I bring. But that confidence didn’t come overnight—it came from years of dedication and learning.

The same was true when I shifted from business coaching to intuitive work—hosting Reiki retreats, leading embodiment practices, and guiding women through spiritual awakenings. At first, I felt unsure. But by continuously practicing and refining my craft, I grew into the leader I am today.

Embracing the Beginner Phase: My Dance Journey

Recently, I pushed myself outside my comfort zone by joining an intensive dance program. I was the least experienced dancer in a room full of professionals. At first, I struggled with coordination and self-doubt. But I noticed something powerful: the way I spoke to myself directly impacted my performance.

When I let negative self-talk take over, I froze up. But when I shifted my mindset—telling myself, You’re improving every week. Look at you for showing up!—I felt stronger, more capable, and more willing to try.

The Language You Use Shapes Your Reality

Your words hold power. If you constantly tell yourself, I’m not good at this, you reinforce that belief. Instead, shift your language:

• Instead of: “I suck at this.”
  Try: “I’m in the process of improving.”
• Instead of: “I’m terrible at this.”
  Try: “I’m learning and getting better every time I practice.”

This small shift can make a massive difference in how you approach challenges and build confidence over time.

The Balance of Faith and Action

Confidence is a partnership between faith and effort. You need to take consistent action, but you also need to trust the process. Before you get validation from others—before the accolades, the testimonials, the success—you need to believe in yourself. Faith carries you through the in-between from beginner to expert.

Final Thoughts: Confidence is Built, Not Born

If you’re feeling stuck, uncertain, or afraid of failing—lean into it. Take the class. Start the project. Say yes to the opportunity. Confidence isn’t about being perfect; it’s about being willing to grow.

Want to dive deeper into this topic? Listen to the full episode of our podcast, where we break down the traps of comparison, share real-life stories, and give actionable tips on shifting your mindset. Tune in and start today!

And if you’re ready for a life-changing experience, consider joining us for a transformational experience at one of our upcoming Women’s Retreats. These retreats are your chance to unplug from the noise, step away from daily roles, and reconnect with yourself on a deeper level. You’ll learn and get certified in the Japanese healing art of Reiki, break through the barriers holding you back, and step into a more authentic, radiant version of yourself.

It’s an opportunity to tune into your intuition, develop your spiritual and psychic gifts, and deepen your connection with yourself. No distractions, no filters—just you, fully present and fully seen. Learn more about our upcoming retreats HERE or message Samantha on Instagram (@samantha.bove) with the word “RETREAT.”

Here’s to embracing the journey and becoming the confident, unstoppable version of yourself. See you next week, love!